


Not the Worst Idea

by serenelystrange



Category: Leverage
Genre: Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Friends to Lovers, Gen, Leverage Secret Santa Gift Exchange 2019, M/M, idiots to lovers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-29
Updated: 2020-12-29
Packaged: 2021-03-10 16:34:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,798
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28400235
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/serenelystrange/pseuds/serenelystrange
Summary: In an effort to stop a sweet but meddlesome matchmaker, Eliot finds himself with a pretend boyfriend, a real crush, and way too many cinnamon rolls!
Relationships: Alec Hardison/Eliot Spencer
Comments: 12
Kudos: 40
Collections: Leverage Secret Santa Exchange (Mod Gifts)





	Not the Worst Idea

**Author's Note:**

  * For [seraphina_snape](https://archiveofourown.org/users/seraphina_snape/gifts).



“I worry about you, is all.”

Eliot smiles over at Betty, the matronly bakery owner who packs him up a box of sweet treats every week for the team meeting. Providing they aren’t out of town or in the hospital on or after a job, of course.

“If I was just a few years older,” Eliot teases kindly, “I’d propose right now!”

Betty gives him an amused look and laughs, pushing the box into his hands.

“I’m old enough to be your mother, mister, and we both know it. Your flattery is always welcome, though.”

Eliot gives her a faux-wounded look. “How could anyone else compare to you? I’m destined to be alone forever because my sweet Betty denies me!”

Betty rolls her eyes and shoos her hand at Eliot, towards the door.

“Get out of my shop, Romeo,” she says.

Eliot’s still laughing as he heads out the door, Betty’s fondly exasperated sigh drifting out after him.

“I think it’s sweet,” Sophie says, when Eliot recounts the interaction at the team meeting.

“She keeps trying to set me up with her daughters though,” Eliot grumbles slightly. “And nieces.”

“Did you tell her, you know…” Hardison trails off.

“That I was bisexual?” Eliot asks, rolling his eyes. “I tried that the first time, and all that happened was that she tried to set me up with her nephew. And second-cousin once removed or something. Both apparently “very nice boys.””

“How big is this woman’s family?” Parker asks, snickering.

“Big enough,” Eliot says, huffing.

Nate clears his through, thoroughly not caring about any of this, and the meeting begins.

The next time Eliot goes into the bakery, Betty is nowhere to be seen, and in her place is a pretty woman somewhere in her 30’s, with auburn hair and wide blue eyes.

“How can I help you?” she asks when Eliot comes up to the counter.

Frowning slightly, Eliot tells her his order, having to repeat the selection for the first time in months. Betty always knows what he wants.

“Is Betty ok?” Eliot asks, giving the new girl a concerned look. “I didn’t think she ever took days off.”

The woman gives him a sweet smile and nods.

“She’s just a little under the weather, nothing to be concerned about.”

Eliot watches her carefully, the tingling on his neck that Hardison would call his spidey-sense going off. She boxes up his pastries easily enough, but can’t seem to get the string tied properly the way that Betty does. She moves to the register to ring him up, and for a moment seems to stare at the machine like she’s never used it, before hitting what Eliot is sure are the wrong buttons. His suspicions are confirmed a moment later when the display on the register shows a total some ten dollars less than it usually is. The woman looks at him nervously, brushing her hands down against her apron. Her immaculate, loosely tied apron.

“Ok,” Eliot says, knowing all at once what this is. “Where is Betty actually hiding out? And which one her relatives are you?”

The woman freezes for a moment, as if deciding whether or not she wants to lie. After the moment, she just sighs and hands Eliot the box of pastries.

“Her ex daughter-in law,” she explains, shrugging. “Darlene,” she adds.

“Nice to meet you,” Eliot says, shaking her hand briefly because he still has manners after all.

“Sorry,” she stage whispers to Eliot, hooking a thumb to gesture towards the back where Betty must be hiding. “You know how she is when she gets something in her head. I tried to tell her I was happy single, but she insisted I needed to meet this _nice young man with sweet blue eyes._ ”

Eliot laughs and grins at her.

“Yeah, that sounds like Betty,” he agrees.

Darlene smirks. “Here,” she says. “You get these free for having to deal with a Betty Ambush.”

“Appreciated,” Eliot says, shoving a ten dollar bill in the tip jar anyway.

“Bye Betty!” he yells out to the back as he leaves, laughing to himself when he hears Darlene smugly telling Betty she told her so.

“I have an idea,” Hardison says one day after their meeting.

“How scary,” Eliot teases.

“Shut up,” Hardison says, smacking Eliot lightly. “I mean, for your baker lady problem.”

Eliot looks at him, eyebrows raised in wait.

“She thinks she needs to set you up with half her family because she thinks you’re lonely, right?” Hardison asks.

Eliot nods.

“So the way I see it,” Hardison continues, “All you have to do show her that you are in a happy and committed relationship already, she should back off.”

“Won’t work,” Eliot says. “She knows everyone in town, somehow. She’d know if I was making it up.”

“Well tell her your girlfriend lives in Canada or something,” Hardison says. “I think it could work!”

“Nobody believes the Canadian Girlfriend lie,” Eliot laughs. “Betty knows the only people I ever spend time with are y’all, and I’m certainly not dating any of you.”

From the couch, Parker snorts in laughter, before going back to trying to beat her level of Candy Crush.

Hardison, however, beams in response as his face lights up with an idea.

“Whatever it is,” Eliot says, “no.”

He knows that face. He doesn’t trust that face.

“Come on, El,” he says. “Just bring Parker into the shop a few times, and I’m sure Betty will adore her.

“Not doing it,” Parker says, still looking at her phone. “You know I don’t act unless it’s a con.”

“Think of it as a mini-con!” Hardison says.

Parker dies in her game again and drops the phone to her lap before looking up at Hardison and Eliot with a furrowed brow.

“Betty is nice,” she says. “And makes us delicious pastries. And didn’t call the cops that one time Eliot came in covered in blood. She doesn’t deserve to be conned.”

“Now you decide to have a strong moral code??” Hardison asks, both amused and annoyed.

“Yup!” Parker says, grinning.

“It was a nice try, man,” Eliot says, thumping Hardison on the back companionably.

Parker’s eyes narrow in consideration as she looks at them, and her lips quirk up into a mischievous smile.

“If you are going to lie to her,” she says to Eliot, “even though I don’t think you should…. Hardison could be your pretend boyfriend.”

“What?” Eliot and Hardison say in perfect stereo, causing Parker to bark out a surprised laugh.

“You both like men,” she says. “And you’ve worked together for years. You spend a lot of time together, know enough about each other to answer any questions she might throw at you, and most importantly… you would secure us a whole box of congratulatory pastries!”

“I will not be your literal sugar daddy!” Eliot says, giving Parker a stern look.

“Yes you will,” Parker replies, just as stern.

“It’s not the worst idea,” Hardison says after a moment, shrugging.

Eliot looks over at Hardison in disbelief, flushing slightly at the thought and hoping the others don’t notice.

“You think you can pretend to be in love with me for a whole visit?” Eliot asks, warily.

“Two whole visits, if we get enough of those cinnamon rolls,” Hardison says.

“Fine,” Eliot says, conceding. “But if she calls us out on it, you’re the one who is going to have to find a new bakery!”

“Duly noted,” Hardison says, holding out his hand for Eliot to shake.

Eliot does, resolutely ignoring the thrill of sparks that runs up his arm as their hands meet.

“Betty, this is Hardison,” Eliot introduces, getting right to the point. “My boyfriend.”

Betty eyes the two men carefully, taking in their joined hands with no small amount of suspicion.

“Hardison?” she asks. “Like the Hardison you’ve been talking about for two years? That you work with?”

“Aw, you talk about me, babe?” Hardison asks, turning and giving Eliot his best moon eyes.

“Nothing but good things,” Betty assures him. “But he didn’t tell me how handsome you were!”

“I regret everything in my life that has led up to this moment,” Eliot says drolly.

“Don’t be like that, pumpkin,” Hardison coos, draping himself dramatically against Eliot’s side.

Eliot gives Betty a look that says ‘ _see what I put up with?’_

Betty gives them another assessing glance before nodding and smiling brightly.

“I’m so happy for you!” she says. “Let me get you some of those cinnamon rolls you like so much,” she says to Hardison before heading towards the kitchen in the back.

“She knows how much I love the cinnamon rolls?” Hardison asks, smirking over at Eliot and squeezing his hand tightly so that Eliot can’t run away.

“Everyone talks about their coworkers!” Eliot says defensively.

And Hardison, being the intuitive and kind man that Eliot has possibly been pining for, stops his teasing and just gives Eliot a soft look, smiling faintly at him.

“Here you go, boys,” Betty says, all their stuff packed up into two boxes, tied neatly with the carrying string.

She waves them off as other customers come in and they make their way outside to regroup on the sidewalk.

Eliot goes to pull his hand away, but Hardison stops him gently.

“Wait,” he requests. “I just want to try one more thing.”

Before Eliot can question it, Hardison is kissing him, one hand pressed up against the brick of the building next to Eliot’s head. For a torturous moment, Eliot freezes while his brain catches up, but then existence slams back into him and he kisses Hardison back greedily, holding the boxes carefully between them so they don’t get crushed. Hardison would be heartbroken if anything happened to his cinnamon rolls.

“Well, shit,” Hardison says when they’ve managed to pull away from one another. “Parker was right.”

“About what?” Eliot asks, lips tingling and face flushed as he looks up at Hardison.

Hardison grins down at him with hooded eyes, crooked smile on his mouth.

“That you might want to kiss me as much as I want to kiss you,” he says. “She also said you were probably in love with me…but that’s probably crazy, right?” Hardison asks, laughing but also looking at Eliot with a hopeful gaze.

Eliot leans against the brick wall, letting the uneven pressure ground him in the moment.

“Parker might have a point,” he says, at last.

Hardison gasps, and then they’re kissing again, and Eliot doesn’t even care that it’s broad daylight on a busy street, or that the pastry boxes fall to the ground with a muffled plop.

He’ll buy Hardison every cinnamon roll in the place so long as he kisses him like this, quite possibly forever.

THE END


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